Wednesday, August 17, 2011

How can I help my friend with her abusive father?

My friend has had an extremely rocky relationship with her father ever since I met her. He is an extreme authoritarian parent. He doesn't let her out of the house except for school and he monitors all her activities like a hawk. As her girl friend, the only way I was allowed to hang out with her was to sneak her out of the house to see movies etc. when he was at work. He also physically hits her when he is angry with her and I have always had a suspicion that some ual harment was present (though unconfirmed). Anyway, once my friend went off to college she sort of went wild. See sleeps around with quite a few guys and experiments with a lot of sketchy things. This summer she moved back in with her dad after school let out. Recently, he found an empty condom in her room and got VERY angry, punching her in the face multiple times. She wants to move out and as her friend, I feel obligated to provide a temporary place for her to stay because she claims that living with him hereafter will be almost impossible. Still, I can't help feeling some doubts about getting involved. She has no plans except to pack her things and walk out. She has no money, no extended family to provide financial support and she lost her scholarship because of poor grades. I am attending school on a full scholarship and I do not depend on my parents for ANY help whatsoever. If I allow her to move in to my mother's home, my mom is going to feel responsible for her. My mom is a single parent taking care of my two younger siblings on her own and I don't want to add any extra pressure. I am willing to help my friend become emancipated, get a job and move out the right way but I'm not will to just let her 'crash' at my house because she wants freedom but doesn't have any plans. What should I do? Am I being unreasonable?

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